Everybody knows about the book that hasn’t just gone viral but it also got women thinking and wishing for more sex. As far as the movie, it has provided us with very explicit ways to oomph an orgasm.
The erotica novel has got everybody’s attention and got women reading it like crazy making out of it a bestseller. Although the book talks about a “Christian Grey” with a much more confident and mysterious personality that, in my reader’s opinion, didn’t delivered in the adaptation of the movie quite well, he sure is a “Prince Charming” that still made us love the movie as much as the book.
When it comes to sexual positions, Fifty Shades of Grey has delivered us a few and we chose our favorites to talk about. So why not make out of your bedroom a “playroom”? BDSM is all about bondage, domination, sado-masochism and discipline.
The tips and sex positions from Fifty Shades of Grey can be practiced by everyone so whether you feel comfortable using studded spanking paddles and riding a crop or just improving your usual sex positions, the movie and the book serve as a guide into start of using them.
Also you should never assume that Fifty Shades of Grey it a book or a movie just for women. It can be a source of inspiration for men too judging by the fact that women all over go crazy when they hear about Christian Grey, it must be something that he’s doing right.
I feel it’s a real blessing for couples when something like this happens. People can get really unhealthy comfortable in their old positions or with their standardized moves and this kind of phenomenon wakes up the inner sinner in everybody.
Foreplay is one step you shouldn’t skip over. The kissing and caressing are often first physical manifestation of lust but unfortunately it gets often forgotten during sex. There are not a few women who complain about foreplay as being some kissing and breast play for a maximum of 10 minutes before the act.
Men are usually the ones who have to let their partner know what is on their mind and should spend more time on teasing in order for women to really crave their bodies by the time they both reach to the bedroom.
Foreplay in Fifty Shades of Grey movie and book
Foreplay is the perfect time to understand that experimenting every part of the body can prolong your sexual act and it will help you understand your partner’s body and he’s needs and desires. In the book, Ana inserts a couple of Ben Wa balls right before going out with Christian, making her feel horny with every step.
As an example you could take this scene from the book:
“He lunges at me, pushing me against the wall of the elevator. Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his hips . . . His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine . . . My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance . . . He brings his hand up to grasp my chin and holds me in place . . . and his hips restraining me. His erection is against my belly.”
It’s all about talks like this that gets the partner hot and bothered and Fifty Shades of Grey points out that the idea of foreplay consists in speaking up your mind and not in suddenly grabbing women in elevators. Investing time into tempting and teasing the partner before hitting the sheets will assure your sexual sensations and it can lead you on into a deeper feeling that sex is about having fun and not about reaching desperately the orgasm.
Beginner’s sex guide
The famous position in which Anastasia loses her virginity or the “Deflowerer”, as Cosmopolitan calls, it requires putting your knees in the air and having your partner push into you slowly about four times and then shifting onto his elbows, making his height rest against you while thrusting quickly. It’s more like a starter missionary position to get you craving for more sexual adventure. Not saying that missionary couldn’t be nice, it can be romantic sure but never settle down in bed to your comfortable standards.
What women find so sexy about Mr. Grey is his knowledge and dominance involving sex, things that can easily be done by anyone without turning your bedroom into a “room of pain”, like trying out sex toys, new positions or sexy lingerie.
Start-up tips to Bondage from Fifty Shades of Grey movie
But let’s talk about a bit of beginner’s bondage, because that is what is most wanted from this movie. The fantasy of tying one on is popular before Fifty Shades of Grey and it’s all about submission and domination. Some of you might look at it in a demeaning way thinking “I’m never going to do or say that!” and we are not trying to convince you into doing it but if you are curious about the topic read our Fifty Shades of Grey tips to get started or inspired.
Another positions you could try is the one in which Anastasia demands more sex. It requires getting your partner to beg for more. He has to thrust deeply from behind in a very slowly pace and after a few more, he has to pull out and wait until she demands more.
You can also try to pull your partner’s hair from this position to increase the sexual feeling. This involves teasing the girl and making her beg for more and as we women know, teasing and foreplay is an essential part of sex and it can give a hot start that can make the partners experiment more.
Here is an inspired position from the movie that should come after foreplay consisting in flipping the girl over with her ass in the air and her knees and elbows on the bed kind of like in the doggy style position. This move can be quite delicate that is why Cosmopolitan calls it the “Frisky Flip”. After some hard but gentle spanking he should deeply thrust into the girl.
Trying to spice up things isn’t a bad idea if you talk about them the right way. During a pillow talk you can talk to your partner about spanking, sex toys and even handcuffs. When it comes to bringing an extra taught to your sex life it’s all about being honest and having confidence when you express that taught. Self-confidence will always be a huge turn on while being sincere can work on partner with more receptiveness than you think.
If your partner is willing to get spanked, tied up or dominated then you are in for a good time and if not you have no idea what you’re missing out. There are so many ways to get someone tied up if you know the usual tricks to get it right like having common sense, being smart and don’t ever forget about your tied partner!
There are many things you could use as a replacement for rope like belts and scarves. Once again, as soon as your partner is well-bound, you should not forget about foreplay. Don’t jump right into it and spend time touching your partner the way he or she loves it and if you haven’t discovered that yet this is the perfect timing to figure it out since all your attention is on him/her.
Here you have a common scenario of a hot tying game: Bind both of your partner’s ankles and wrists and bring them both behind their back or in front, either way it feels better for them.
The visual that this type of tying gives makes you look at your partner as a well-tied gift just waiting for you to do whatever you want with them. And because it’s more of a hot looking position rather than a practical one you could always try “frogtie”. This requires tying each ankle to each corresponding wrist so that your partner could stand facing up with their arms by their side. The ankles will be pulled back and apart in order for you to get creative and turned on by the biding.
Tying up as seen on Fifty Shades of Grey
Using the crop like you’ve seen in Fifty Shades of Grey means having the girl tied up, blindfolded and dragging a riding crop from her stomach all the way to her clitoris, stimulating her until she comes.
You can also try the “Bed Post Bend”, name which Cosmopolitan suggested in which you need to be tied to the bedpost while lying on your stomach and lifting your ass in order for him to enter you from behind. Get a tight grip on the bedpost and push back against him and hold on there.
Blindfolding means reducing one’s sense in order to enhance the other senses and it also let’s your imagination free. You could do it with his tie to be on the theme and drag him in whatever spot in the house you might think it’s exciting.
The idea is that you are in total control of the situation and of your partner so may do as well as you please. Since he/she can’t see what is going on it makes the whole experience very hot. The one who is blindfolding should have something prepared to surprise their partner like ice, a feather or sex toys, like the Ben Wa balls from Fifty Shades of Grey.
In order to get this right the girl should bend over and grab her ankles while the guy inserts in her vagina the Ben Wa balls. She could walk around through the house or get water like Anastasia did with the balls inside. After that she should lie across his lap with her ass facing up while he rubs her ass from the cheeks all the way to the clitoris. The feeling of his touch with the balls inside should make this experience very passionate and intense.
Blindfolding works great if you can become too self-conscious. Keeping out distractions and amplifying every other sense should make your partner’s touches feel unimaginable. You could also trail kiss down their stomach or blow shiver-inducing breaths of air across their body and especially their neck.
Moaning and Talking
The thing that women loved about Christian Grey was the fact that he was so upfront when it came to sex and about everything he wanted. Christian puts into words everything that turns him on and for women it is an exciting thrill to hear that.
In the book he said many times what was on his mind like: “Show me how you pleasure yourself,” “How do you make yourself come? I want to see.” Of course intonation counts as well. Men don’t have to sound too excited because they might seem a little desperate and you want to get women to feel that way. In addition too shy might ruin it too because they will lack of confidence and women need to feel that is alright to express themselves.
As a tip you could think that she wants you already and that she is just unconvinced about the idea. It’s you who has to make her feel comfortable with anything crosses her mind because every woman has an inner sexual voice, you just have to show her that it turns you on in order for it to verbalize the naughty desires.
This applies as well if you’re to make the guy to speak up his mind. Women could always try on some black over-the-knee boots and lingerie or why not nothing else. By pushing him against the wall and gently pulling his hear, whispering “You’re going to do whatever I tell you to do tonight”, you might end up surprised how much this thrills him.
Sex on the Desk
One of the most exhilarating scenes from Fifty Shades of Grey is when Christian is having sex with Ana on his office desk. The point of this is not that you are doing it on a desk but it’s about having sex on an impulse. And it’s not always necessary to have orgasm, in fact the anticipation builds you sexually for hot and steamy sex later.
If it’s not to your possession, use any other young multimillionaire entrepreneur to sit at a desk as you clear it dramatically and sit on the desk’s edge get to straddle a leg over his lap.
You could either let him stand while you wrap your legs around him in order for him to slide in or lay back having your legs up over he’s shoulders for his strokes to feel more intense.
Remember when Christian said: “A little spanking can actually enhance your orgasm”? Well he knew what this was all about. It comes from your brain that releases dopamine when you feel pleasure or pain.
Any act of bondage that includes spanking or tying up should be done with someone who they really trust and loves. Someone has to be dominant and the other submissive. That is why it’s important for them to really know each other and respect one another.
Like we saw in the movie and read in the book there has to exist a sort of rules and in that order negotiations. Both parts should know how far the dominance can go so that the submissive will know he won’t go too far then they initially agreed or set up a safe word.
Spanking lovers should be aware of a few advices like slowly spanking first with the palm of the hand in order for the partner to get turned on by the slower way you slap. So that the partner gets to release more endorphins when you go harder. Agree on a spanking level by exercising smacks for you to know how much to slow down or go harder.
Settle to a safe word and always respect it. Don’t ever forget about teasing. If using a crop, slowly rub the end of it on all body before harder smacking. This helps to stimulate their senses especially if you use a soft part to gently slap afterwards.
If you’re not feeling comfortable with crops you could always use your own hands. It gives an extra feeling of intimacy if you warm up you palms first. If you know yourself as too afraid to ask to get spanked, while having sex, grab your partner’s hand and move it to the hips and ultimately to get them to squeeze your cups.
If you enjoy giving hot spanks you could always just ask or work it through the moment. A massage can give you the opportunity to insist on the ass and when you really get to it, gently smack it and wait for your partner’s reaction so that you know if you could go on or stop. It it’s ok give it a few rows of firmly but slow slaps.
Once, it was inappropriate and not well received that women could manifest their dominant sexual expressions that is if they weren’t working as a dominatrix.
The scenario of a powerful man and a submissive woman is so far constraint to our life experiences and throughout history that today we don’t even realize it. Also the same scenario serves today as an erotic manifestation of desire and sexual creativity for both women and men.
In addition to those realities, Fifty Shades of Grey may symbolize as the ultimate embracing capitalist consumerism but it definitely brought up themes that resonate with each and every one of us, acting as an awakening for our inner selves to enjoy and celebrate our sexual desires in a manner where self-consciousness is no longer a problem.
Hopefully these advices and positions will bring a kinky plot into your sex life and we feel it’s absolutely necessary to get inspired in bed, whether it’s sexual toys or just the two of you.